The Goat Is Back In New Haven

The Goat Is Back In New Haven

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Last Shabbos Rabbi Daniel Greer, the Goat, fled to Newport, Rhode Island.  This caused the citizens of Newport to contact me and ask for my advice on how to rid themselves of the depraved Goat.  They said that some members of the historic Touro synagogue walked out when they saw the Goat walk in.  One Newport resident snapped a picture of the Goat and asked me to post it on my blog.  I didn’t have very good advice for the residents of the Town of Newport.  I told them to spray bear scent in the town, bears are higher on the food chain than goats.  If that didn’t work, I told them to spray pepper in their gardens.

This past Shabbos the Goat was back in his stable in his house overlooking Edgewood Park in New Haven.  The Goat’s old black Mercury was parked in his usual spot in the driveway between his goat shul and the boys dorm building.  The goat frequently makes visits to the dorm building after praying in his Goat shul.  The Goat put up a sign in his driveway that reads, “RESERVED PARKING.”  The sign used to say “NO PARKING.”  The Goat would rather park in front of a no parking sign, as he likes to break the law.  The Goat has been breaking the law for the last 30 years as he lured teenage boys from broken homes into the compound with his sidekick Avi Hack.

The Goat’s wife, the Ewe, will not leave the Goat.  There is no me too movement for Ewes so she is stuck with her depraved husband.  She may very well wish to leave the Goat, but where would she go?  Her children will never forgive her for not stopping the Goat from abusing them for many years.  During the Mirlis trial the judge allowed testimony that the Goat may have raped one of his own sons.  Avi Hack testified that the Ewe was jealous of his role as the Goat’s mistress, and wouldn’t forgive him on Yom Kippur.

The Ewe was abusive in her own right.  I heard from a number of former students from the long defunct Tikvah girls high school. The Tikvah girls told me that the Ewe ran the school like a tyrant, regularly subjecting Tikvah girls to ridicule, derision and abuse.  The Ewe even gave the Tikvah girls a disparaging nickname.  Yale’s nickname is the bulldogs.  Southern Connecticut’s nickname is the Owls, because kids at Southern have reputations as wise owls.  The nickname for Hillhouse High School kids is “Academics” because they are book worms.  The Ewe named her girls the Tikvah Typos.  A typo is a misspelled word, a mistake, a fruckup.

The Ewe wouldn’t allow Tikvah Typos to have friends.  Each Typo was supposed to be a loner, dedicated to the Greer family.  The Typos were encouraged to rat out other Typos, who were subjected to harsh disciplinary measures if they were found in the possession of a trashy teen magazine.  The Greers regularly conducted raids of the Typos desks and belongings.

The compound was a sadistic prison, operating openly in New Haven for 30 years.  The only person who came close to exposing this prison was Yale man and New Haven Advocate reporter Paul Bass.  Back then the Bass had a backbone.  But Paul was a dismal failure.  Paul backed down while the Goat continued to rape boys.  Paul now runs the Communist New Haven Independent.  Paul covers exciting subjects such as New Haven budget meetings.  Stop wasting your time Paul.  As soon as Hartford is out of bankruptcy New Haven will be filing it’s own bankruptcy petition.  There is nothing you can do to stop the red ink flowing from the government.  You had the chance to stop a child rapist and you failed.  Stop trying to make up for your typos.

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