Hundreds of Ivy League rug rat juvenile delinquents stormed the recent annual football field at the Yale bowl to protest Harvard and Yale investments in fossil fuel companies. The Yale and Harvard corporations have combined endowments of $70 billion. They are both tax exempt and pay almost nothing to the IRS, the States of Connecticut and Massachusetts. Yale pays almost nothing towards New Haven property taxes on the $2.5 billion in real estate that Yale owns in New Haven. These students should protest the tax exempt status of these greedy tax exempt corporations. Uncle Shmuel is very generous when it comes to corporate welfare for the rich and powerful.
After the Ivy League juvenile delinquents stormed the field the New Haven and Yale cops stormed the field. The cops told the youngsters to get off the field. The young protesters wouldn’t leave until they finished taking selfies. It took them about an hour to finish taking their selfies.
The cops couldn’t let the delinquents go without making a few arrests. The cops went easy on the Commie rug rats. They handed out 48 tickets and charged each student delinquent with disorderly conduct. Each ticket ordered each youngster to appear in Superior court on Elm Street on December 6th. They were all charged with disorderly conduct. Those charges aren’t so bad. A good Jew lawyer should be able to get them thrown out. Most Yalies hire fellow Yalie Willie the Dow, Willie the Goy, to defend them. But this morning there was no sign of Willie the Dow. Legendary fighting Irish street lawyer and UCONN Law graduate Hugh Keefe was in Court defending the little Ivy rug rats. Willie the Dow was down 500 points this morning.
Two young Yalies refused to leave the field after the cops gave them a ticket and instructed them to leave the field. Yale Jews Michael Gaspar and Mark Rosenberg gave the cops a hard time. The didn’t follow orders. They told the cops they wanted to have a picnic on the field. They had bagel and lox sandwiches in their backpacks. They kept saying “Lox Et Veritas” when the cops told them they had the right to remain silent. The New Haven cops refused to let Gaspar and Rosenberg eat their sandwiches on the 50 yard line. The cops charged Gaspar with disorderly conduct and first-degree trespass. Rosenberg was charged with disorderly conduct, first-degree criminal trespass, and interfering with police. They were both hauled off in a paddy wagon.
If you want to help these young rug rat Commie criminals you can make a contribution to the Ivy League Privileged Jewish Rug Rat Student Legal Defense Fund. Please send your check directly to me and make the check out to “Larry Noodles.” I will cash the check. After taking out my transaction fee I will forward the balance of the money to Attorney Hugh Keefe. Or I may just keep the whole check as a donation towards the Larry Noodles fund. I may have to provide these students with prison consultant advice if any of them has to go to jail. Or I may have to bribe the guards and other inmates to assure their safety in the Big House.
Yale graduate Paul Bass, who runs the New Haven Independent, was not at the Yale-Harvard game. Paul Bass missed the protest. Paul was too busy partaking in religious Jew activities on the Sabbath. Paul Bass also failed to cover the criminal court proceedings this morning against his Yale rug rat brethren. Paul didn’t even send his co-Yalie reporter underling Chris Peak to cover the court case. I suspect a Yale Red Commie White Privilege Canadian Goose conspiracy at the New Haven Independent.
Law and Order actor, and Hollywood director, Yale graduate Sam Waterston was at the protest. Waterston is an old WASP who can trace his lineage to the Mayflower. Waterston didn’t get busted. Waterston privilege. Waterston, and Mel Gibson, are the token goys in Hollywood. Waterston also went to the Sorbonne in Paris. He may have taken a few classes with the Lubavitch Rebbe.
Connecticut governor and Yale graduate Ned Lamont were also at the protest. Lamont tried to convince the Commie rug rats to stop taking selfies and leave the field. Lamont didn’t get arrested. Lamont should pardon all these juvenile law breakers.
The New Haven Board of Alderman passed a resolution to support the out of State Ivy League rug rats. The Board resolved the following: The Board of Alders “recognizes the climate crisis and the Puerto Rican debt crisis. The board further recognizes that Yale, one of the richest institutions in the world, must take the lead in providing solutions. We support the protesters, and ask that all charges be dropped and that no disciplinary action be taken.” Why didn’t the Board of Alderman pass a resolution to support local New Haven presumed to be innocent criminals who are locked up for months on end because they can’t afford $100 to pay the bondsman to get out of jail? Why didn’t the Board of Alderman pass a resolution to end the plea bargain system that punishes criminals who go to trial and lose and get hit with a long prison sentence, as punishment for not taking a plea bargain “suggested” by the prosecutor?
The Goat got sentenced to 20 long years suspended after 12 because he availed himself of his Constitutional right to trial by jury. Had the Goat plea bargained he could have got his sentence cut in half. Why should the Goat be punished with such a long prison sentence merely because he was asserting his right under the Constitution? The Goat will be spending his first Shabbos in prison tonight. There will be no kosher food, no Shabbos candles, no Shabbos zimros, no challah, no wine, no grape juice, no Torah reading, no honors in shul, no kiddush, and no teenage boys to rape. If you complain the inmates and guards will tell you, “This is jail, what do you expect?” If you can’t do the crime don’t do the time. Or, if you can do the time, make sure you commit a Federal crime, and then you can do your time in Otisville Federal prison, and celebrate Shabbos every week with your Jewish brethren.
This is the Hebrew month of Kislev, the month of Chanukah, the month of miracles. The 19th day of Kislev is celebrated as the “Rosh Hashanah of Chassidism.” It was on this date, in the year 1798, that Rabbi Schneur Zalman of Liadi was freed from his imprisonment in czarist Russia. May all the Jews be freed from galut, in Russia, China, and Commie America.
“Come now, Mattaathias, be the first to obey the King’s command, as all the Gentiles and Judeans have done, then you and your sons shall be numbered among the King’s friends, and you and your sons shall be honored with silver and gold and many gifts. You are a leader, and honorable and great man in the city, supported by sons and kindred. But Mattathias answered in a loud voice, ‘Although the Gentiles and Judeans in the king’s realm obey him, so that they forsake their religion and consent to the king’s orders, yet I and my sons will keep to the covenant of our ancestors. We will not obey the words of the King by departing from our religion in the slightest degree.’” 1 Maccabees Ch. 2.
“The hand of G-d lay heavy upon the he-goats, the ewes, the crooks, the politicians, and the infidels, and He wrought havoc among them: He struck them with hemorrhoids.” I Samuel 5-6
“It is better to be cursed by the Prophet Achiya ha’Shiloni, and repeatedly cursed out by Larry Noodles, than to be blessed by Bil’am.” Taanit 20.
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